Texas Fizz
3 ounces gin
1 teaspoon orange juice
1/2 teaspoon lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon grenadine
Shake ingredients with cracked ice
Strain into a chilled wine glass
Top with soda water
Texas Sweat
Equal parts of: Grenadine
Green Creme de Menthe
Cuervo & Bacardi Rum
Layer in order into a
Pony or Shot glass
Midnight Cowboy
2 oz Bourbon
1 oz Dark Rum
1/2 oz Heavy Cream
Shake all the ingredients in a shaker
With ice and strain into a cocktail glass.
Western Rose
1/2 oz Apricot Brandy
1/2 oz Dry Vermouth
1 oz Gin
1/4 tsp lemon juice
Shake all ingredients with ice
Strain into a cocktail glass
Texas Jokes:
They Really Grow Them Big In Texas
A Texan went to Chicago, where he thought he
would buy a new "city" outfit. He went into
Marshall Fields and, when asked by a sweet
young woman if she could help him, he answered,
"Yes, ma'am. Ya see, I'm from Texas,
and I want to buy a complete city outfit."
Her eyes lit up as she asked,
"Where would you like to start?"
"Well, ma'am, how about a suit?"
"Yes, sir. What size?"
"Size 53 tall, ma'am."
"Wow, that's really big."
"Yes, ma'am, they really
grow them big in Texas."
"What's next?" she asked.
He replied,
"How about some shoes?"
"What size?"
"Size 15 double D."
"Wow, that's really big!"
"Yes, ma'am.
They really grow them big in Texas."
"What's next?"
"Well, I reckon I'll need a shirt."
"Yes, sir. What size?"
"Nineteen and a half neck, size 38,"
he replied.
"Wow, that's really big!"
"Yes, ma'am.
They really grow them big in Texas."
"Will there be anything else?" she asked.
"Yes, ma'am. I spect I'll need a hat."
"Yes, sir. What size?"
"Eight and five-eighths."
"Wow, that's really big!"
"Yes, ma'am.
They really grow them big in Texas."
The woman virtually glowed as she asked,
"Is there anything else I can do for you?"
"No, ma'am , I reckon that will be all."
As the sweet young thing tallied up his bill
and as the Texan counted his money,
she blushed and asked,
"Sir, could I ask you a question?"
"Yes, ma'am, I already know what it is.
And the answer is four inches."
Astonished, she blurted out,
"Why, my boyfriend is bigger than that!"
Without so much as a stutter, the Texan replied,
"From the floor, ma'am?"
