A drunk driver gave this excuse to the police
who stopped her in Menlo Park, Calif., when she
couldn't perform the finger to nose sobriety test:
"I can't find it. I used to have a big nose,
but I got a nose job and now I can't find it."
- San Jose Mercury News
A guy walked into a tax collector's office
with a huge bandage on his nose.
"Had an accident?" asked the tax agent.
"No," answered the man. "I've been paying
through it for a long time,
it gave way under the strain."
- Ralph Godsmith
His nose was so big he could smoke a cigar in the shower!
He has a fairly good nose, as noses run!
Her nose was so big, she had to use a tissue for each nostril!
Her nose was so big, one time it got caught in her
ear, she sneezed, and blew her brains out!
She was so stuck up, when it rained she almost drowned!
Her nose is so big she inhales with an echo!
On his face he has the map of Italy. His nose is the boot!
Her nose isn't much trouble, she just has to lift it a little to eat!
His nose was so big it had its own Zip Code!
At a bus stop, he could shelter 6 people from the rain!
His nose was so big it had its own heart and lungs!