A Housewife's Revenge Lyrics Jewel

A Housewife's Revenge Lyrics Jewel

A Housewife's Revenge Lyrics Jewel

A Housewife's Revenge

Seems like that man took my heart

Laid it neatly out before him on the floor
Then he put on the biggest
heaviest winter boots he had
And stomped on it for three hours
Maybe four
And I hope his Sorrells
Are ruined forever
'Cause you know he knows
How to push my every button

Get down to my last nerve

Like the other day
He forgot to put his beer can
In the recycling bin
And he meant to do it
On purpose I'm sure
So I might just have to tell him
Why his dog, Ralph
That ran away three years ago
Won't be coming home again
Cause you know
He walks around the house
In his underwear

Whenever my girlfriends come around
And perhaps if he were good looking
I might feel a bit jealous, overzealous
But all I feel is embarrassed
Looking at him standing there
Hoping he never finds his left slipper

And my psychiatrist says
I should tell him how I feel
He says, "Oh great
I gotta listen to her snivel again"
So I have these little
Unfulfilled fantasies
Of putting arsenic in his teacup
We'd see who'd be laughing then
If only he was the type to drink tea

Now I hear him come up the driveway
In his El Camino
With its black red-flame firebird on front
He keeps the keys to himself
He won't take me out to the movies
'Cause of football
So I'll just hold out
On something else

I'll never cook him another single
Hungry Man TV dinner again
I say, "Listen man
ou better treat me with some
'Cause I gotta
A whole lotta what you need
Then a whole lot besides
And then still a whole lot more"

He said
"Yeah, if you were talking
About your weight
That might be true
But otherwise all you give me is
Headache and heartburn"

So I took his
Hungry Man TV dinner and his Sorrels
So I took his left slipper
nd his Hungry Man TV dinner
And I spit on his Sorrels
As I walked out the door

And I spit on him
As I walked out the door
By the way, your dog Ralph
on't be coming home again

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