Beer

The German immigrants didn't give up their beer; they made Milwaukee famous.
Unknown

They who drink beer will think beer.
- Washington Irving

BEER: Helping people have sex since 1865.

The most alcoholic beer is Samichlaus Bier brewed by Brauerai Hurlimann of Zurich, Switerland. It is 13.70% alcholol by volume at 20 C with an orginal gravity of 1117.8, The strongest beer as measured by origianl gravity is the German EKU Kulminatur Urtyp hell 28 with 1131.7 and 13.52% alcohol by volume at 20 C.

The weakest liquid ever marketed as a beer was sweet ersatz beer which was brewed in Germany by Sunner, Coln-Kalk, in 1918. It had an original gravity of 1000.96, with less than 0.2% alcohol.

I was at a bar nursing a beer.
My nipple was getting quite soggy.
- Emo Philips


The Complete Idiot's Guide to Beer
Stuart A. Kallen

Bitterness describes the distinct flavor that alpha acids in hops give beer. These acids also acted as a natural preservative that kept beer from spoiling in the days before refrigeration. Hops also have aromatic qualities that give beer a flowery or spicy smell, or bouquet.

The way the beer feels in your mouth is called mouthfeel. Mouthfeel describes the thickness of the beer's body. Beer is described as lightbodied. Usually, the darker the beer, the fuller the body. To wit:
Light beer is light bodied; pale ale is medium bodied; stout is fullbodied. Other mouthfeel terms might be creamy, chewy, humongous, gargantuan, and poo poo.

Grains other than barley that are added to beer are called "adjuncts." Adjuncts like corn and rice are cheaper than barley and give beer a lighter color and flavor. While common as rain, corn gives beer a "chicken-feed" "all-malt" on the label. Beer brewed with corn and rice should cost less than all-malt brews.

Fermentation is the process whereby yeast manufactures enzymes to break down sugar molecules. The result is that sugar is turned into alcohol and carbon dioxide, which is also known as the bubbles in your beer. Hops are flowers from hop plant. When barley is heated through a malting process, the final product becomes known as malt or malted barley.

The thick froth of yeast foam floating on top of fermenting wort is called barm. Barm is more often called "krausen."

You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline, it helps if you have some kinda football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
- Frank Zappa

He was a wise man who invented beer.
- Plato

Beer is proof that God loves us
and wants us to be happy.
- Benjamin Franklin

Without question, the greatest invention
in the history of mankind is beer.
Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a
fine invention, but the wheel does not go
nearly as well with pizza.
- Dave Barry

When I sell liquor, it's called bootlegging;
when my patrons serve it on Lake Shore Drive,
it's called hospitality.
- Al Capone

Fastest Human Beer Bottle Opener:
Daniel Lambert, Sweden, used his teeth to open 50 conventional crown-cap bottles on March 11, 2001. He achieved this in only one minute.

Fastest Beer Bottle Openers:
On April 2, 1999 a team of three people, led by Alois Unertl of the Unertl Brewery, Muhldorf, Germany, opened 300 bottles of beer in 1 minute and 47 seconds. Each person opened 100 bottles before passing the special opener to the next team member.

Largest Beer Bottle Collection:
Ron Werner, USA, has collected 11,644 different beer bottles since 1982. Of these 7,128 are unopened. He has sampled almost every one of his 1,704 brands of beer.

Largest Beer Festival:
Munich's Oktoberfest 99, which took place from September 18 to October 5, was visited by 7 million people, who consumed a record 1,532,197 gallons of beer in 11 beer tents, that stood on a site as large as 50 football fields.

The most alcoholic beer is Samichlaus Bier brewed by Brauerai Hurlimann of Zurich, Switerland. It is 13.70% alcholol by volume at 20 C with an orginal gravity of 1117.8, The strongest beer as measured by origianl gravity is the German EKU Kulminatur Urtyp hell 28 with 1131.7 and 13.52% alcohol by volume at 20 C.

The weakest liquid ever marketed as a beer was sweet ersatz beer which was brewed in Germany by Sunner, Coln-Kalk, in 1918. It had an original gravity of 1000.96, with less than 0.2% alcohol.

---

Beer Lunch Box

1 shot Amaretto
2/3 oz Orange Juice
2/3 oz Beer
Pour Amaretto into shot glass, then set it into a glass a little taller than a brandy snifter.
Pour beer around the shot glass until it's almost at the same level as the top of the shot glass.
Top off glass with O.J.


Beer Buster

1 1/2 oz Vodka
Fill part Beer
1 dash Tabasco Sauce
Pour vodka into a highball glass
fill glass with beer. Add tabasco sauce and stir.


Beer Margarita

12 oz Lime Aid Concentrate
12 oz Beer
12 oz Tequila
Fill a blender 3/4 full of ice
Add above ingredients and blend.


Strip and Go Naked Beer

2 part Pink Lemonade
1 part Beer
1 part Absolut Vodka
Mix above ingredients


Summer Beer

6 cans Beer
12 oz Lemonade Concentrate
9 oz Vodka
Empty beer into a punch bowl.
Add Lemonade Concentrate and Vodka.
Sir, add ice.


Beer Driver
2 oz Vodka 8 oz Orange Juice 12 oz Beer
1 Beer Mug Serving
Mix the vodka and orange juice
just as you make a screwdriver.
Pour in beer

Joke:
Husband's note on refrigerator to his wife:
"Someone from the Guyna Colleges called.
They said the Pabst beer is normal."

Beer Google

Hank Williams
Tear In My Beer Lyrics

Sexy Legs Playgirl Webcams Live