
Women complain about sex more often than men.
Their gripes fall into two major categories:
1. Not enough
2. Too much.
Ann Landers
Television has proved that people will look at
anything rather than each other.
Ann Landers
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive
evidence that you are wonderful.
Ann Landers
Dwell not on the past. Use it to illustrate a point,
then leave it behind. Nothing really matters except
what you do now in this instant of time. From this
moment onwards you can be an entirely different person,
filled with love and understanding, ready with an
outstretched hand, uplifted and positive in every
thought and deed.
Ann Landers
You need that guy like a giraffe needs strep throat.
Ann Landers
The trouble with talking too fast is you may say
something you haven't thought of yet.
Ann Landers
If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you'll be
married to a man who cheats on his wife.
Ann Landers
There could be no honor in a sure success, but much
might be wrested from a sure defeat.
Ann Landers
I advise keeping four feet on the floor and all
hands on deck.
Ann Landers
If you have love in your life, it can make up for a
great many things that are missing. If you don't have
love in your life, no matter what else there is, it's
not enough.
Ann Landers
Some people believe that holding on and hanging
in there are signs of great strength. However,
there are times when it takes much more strength
to know when to let go, and then do it.
Ann Landers
One out of four people in this country is mentally
unbalanced. Think of your three closes friends;
if they seem OK, then you're the one.
Ann Landers
The true measure of a man is how he treats someone
who can do him absolutely no good.
Ann Landers
Too many people today know the price of everything
and the value of nothing.
Ann Landers
People who care about each other enjoy doing things
for one another. They don't consider it servitude.
Ann Landers
No one has the right to destroy another person's
belief by demanding empirical evidence.
Ann Landers
Nobody ever drowned in his own sweat.
Ann Landers
Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work,
so most people don't recognize them.
Ann Landers
Television has proved that people will look at
anything rather than each other.
Ann Landers
The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy,
the single wish to be married, and the married wish
to be dead.
Ann Landers
No one has the right to destroy another person's
belief by demanding empirical evidence.
Ann Landers
Ann Landers Gem of the Day
To fail to forgive is to destroy the bridge over which
one day you may want to travel.
Ann Landers
What is the difference between a dog and a cat? A dog
thinks its owners are family. A cat thinks they are
the staff.
Ann Landers
The best cure for hypochondria is to forget about your
body and get interested in somebody else's.
Ann Landers
A distinguished, white-haired woman approached Yogi Berra
on a warm afternoon in Florida. "Good morning, Mr. Berra,"
she said. "You look mighty cool today." Yogi Berra replied,
"Thank you, ma'am. You don't look so hot yourself.
Ann Landers
He who falls on his face is at least moving forward.
Ann Landers
Size doesn't mean much. The whale is endangered, but the ant
is doing very well, thank you.
Ann Landers
People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy, and they miss a
lot of fun in life.
Ann Landers
Gem of the Day: One reason computers can do a lot more work
than people is because they never have to stop to pick up
the phone when folks misdial.
Ann Landers
Do you want to know the difference between sales and marketing?
When a hitchhiker on the side of the road holds up a sign that
reads "TO DALLAS", that's sales. The hitchhiker with a sign that
reads "I WANT TO GET TO MOM'S FOR CHRISTMAS" qualifies as an
expert in marketing."
Ann Landers
Wisdom does not always come with age. Sometimes, age comes by itself.
Ann Landers
Gem of the Day: You can't turn back the clock, but you can rewind it.
Ann Landers
It's better to be alone than to wish you were.
Ann Landers
Dear Ann Landers:
I have been married for three years and it is obvious that my mother
doesn't like my wife. I can deal with that, but I'm becoming
increasingly upset by the way Mom behaves around my wife, Amelia.
Two weeks ago, there was a milestone family affair, and we hired a
professional photographer to take our family pictures. As we were
preparing to pose for the photo shoot, my mother informed Amelia
that she could not be in the pictures because she was not a blood
relative and not a family member. My wife stepped out, but I could
see she was very hurt. There have been other instances as well.
One evening when several of us went to the theater together, Mom
happened to end up sitting next to Amelia. She abruptly stood up
and moved to the other side of the row and announced,
"I want to sit next to my son." I've asked my mother to please
stop treating Amelia so badly, but she insists she has nothing
against my wife and accuses me of being too sensitive. I hope
you can help me.
Not Mama's Boy in Missouri
Dear Missouri:
Your signature does not match your letter. You certainly sound
like a mama's boy and a gutless one at that. Why didn't you speak
up on your wife's behalf when your mother decided Amelia couldn't
be in the family pictures because she wasn't a blood relative?
And when your mother demanded to sit next to you in the theater,
why didn't you arrange the seating so your wife could be on the
other side? As long as you permit your mother to abuse Amelia,
she will continue to do it. It is high time you asserted yourself,
sonny boy. Check out the Bible where it says, "Therefore a man
shall leave his father and his mother and shall cleave to his wife,
and they shall be one flesh." Copy that directive on a piece of
paper, and tape it to your bathroom mirror.
Ann Landers
I Have No Respect For Justice - Ann Landers
Do Dogs Have Souls? - Ann Landers
Confucius Says Funny Naughty Quotes

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